A few weeks ago, I asked my husband what he wanted for Valentine’s Day. He responded with the “S” word. Not the bad one, the intimate one. I asked him again, “Seriously, what do you want for Valentine’s Day? What do men really want for Valentine’s Day?” He told me the same word again.
I was asking my husband to get a man’s perspective so I could write a gift guide for Valentine’s Day. My husband is a typical “Man’s Man”. He is a techy guy, who enjoys hunting, being outdoors, and watching action movies. Oftentimes, if it’s not a gun, ammo, knife, or the newest Marvel movie, he’s kind of hard to buy for. So, I thought asking him what he wanted would kind of give me an idea. When he responded the way he did, it left me frustrated, thinking “Well, that didn’t answer my question!”
I thought on my husband’s answer over the course of a couple weeks. I was looking for an answer from him of something I could order off of Amazon for him. When in all reality, he doesn’t want a new gadget or movie. He simply wants me, and my undivided attention. He wanted me to simply sit down and talk to him like we used to. I read up on 85 Fun Questions To Ask and decided to give him what he asked for.
As a stay at home mom and work at home mom, my days are crazy! They are filled with laundry, car line, dishes, matching up ads, finding the best deals, shuttling the girls to ballet and gymnastics, answering emails, and many other things. Many evenings when he walks in from work, I need the break so I can focus on a sponsored post or deadline without interruptions. Some nights I work on things for the site well into the night. Needless to say, it doesn’t give him much of my undivided attention, affection, and companionship.
I think many young moms end up so focused on child rearing, house work, and job duties that it leaves them empty by the time dishes are done and kids are in bed. I get it, motherhood is tough. I also know that husbands and wives need to spend time together. Oftentimes, my husband ends up on the “back burner” because I’m too tired to think of anything other than my pillow by 8 pm at night. I need to make him more of a priority. If I’m too tired by the end of the day to spend time with him, I’m too busy. If I say “yes” to something, that means I need to say “no” to something else. This means, I need to cut out some of the busyness so when it comes time for the girls to go to bed, I won’t be quite so ready to go to sleep. 😉
This Valentine’s Day, I challenge you to ask your husband what he wants for Valentine’s Day and truly listen to him. You might be surprised at what he tells you. Don’t laugh it off, or roll your eyes if he wants intimacy. If he’s requesting it, purchase something just for him, and plan a night in. Not only is it frugal since you won’t be spending money to go out, but it will also be a memorable night.