Have you ever had one of those days? One of those days that is just crazy? You know the wake-up late, fussy baby all-day-long, stressed beyond belief days? Or had a week like that?
Last Thursday was my day like that. It felt like the past two weeks catching up with me. I felt like I needed a break. Only how did I have time “take a break” have some “mommy time” or do something for “myself”? Then the thought of doing something for myself makes me think: “Am I being selfish?” After all, I signed up for being a stay-at-home mom. I signed up for the screaming, fussy baby, days that run together with very little adult interaction, days that reek of poopy diapers, days where I want to sit down and cry, days of a back-talking four year old, and just crazy days of being at home. If I signed up for this, why should I “take a break” from it? Does that mean I don’t want to be around my kids, my husband, my house, or my responsibilities at home? Better yet, does it make me a bad mom that I
want need a break and am admitting to it?
I always have this struggle when I have gotten to the point where I need a break, and haven’t said anything about it. Thankfully, my husband has noticed this in me. He has realized the “she’s-about-to-go-crazy” signs and steps in with, “I got the girls. Why don’t you go do something?”
Last Thursday, he realized it. I had been wanting to go to a “Pinterest” Small Group a crafty, creative friend of mine, Chelsea, leads (who by the way, is an awesome photographer too!). I hadn’t been able to go due to my husband’s work schedule and my four year old’s tee-ball schedule. I was going to take my youngest with me Thursday night so I could go, and she was super fussy. My four year old was asking her daddy to go outside to play, I was trying to finish getting ready, and my 10 month old was screaming and fussing. I overheard my husband tell Sabrye (4 year old), “Why don’t we stay inside and take care of Landyre (10 month old), and let Mommy go have some ‘mommy time’?” I looked at him in almost tears, and he just smiled and asked what he could do to help me get ready. I told him I felt bad leaving, and my sweet husband just replied, “It’s OK. You NEED a break. You will only be gone a couple hours. I’ve got the girls. Go and have fun.”
So, off I went. The whole way thinking of everything I needed to do at home. You see, since I started this little blog/site, I’ve been working like crazy. I have been trying to “get it up off the ground”. My thoughts and days are consumed with unique page views, SEO, HTML code, how to “drive traffic” to my blog, and A LOT of comparison and self-doubt. Of course, I could have hired someone like this Cheshire SEO Agency to help me and made things a lot easier for myself! But, in truth, I didn’t really learn about a lot of the services out there until my website had been up and running for a while and optimized with a service providing SEO in Cumbria. I have been so busy with trying to “please everyone” enough in a sense that they will all want to read what I write, come here first when looking for a deal, want to “follow me” on Twitter and Pinterest, etc. Our sermon from the Sunday before (which we reviewed at Small Group) was on “Escaping the People Pleaser Trap”. I realized I was in that trap with this site. I was so busy with trying to “please” all my readers, that I fell into the trap! When God shaped me to be me! God didn’t shape me to be behind the biggest website out there, because honestly, that bigger website that I keep comparing myself to, isn’t me. But I know it’s one of the many goals that bloggers and business owners have. Some people dream about having the best website out there; one that drives in traffic, and this does get achieved when you use a professional SEO company to show you what works and what doesn’t. The more people that visit your website, the better you will fare in the search engines, but this will only be made possible if you have a site that incorporates all of the right things. And if this is one of your aims, then I say go for it. But it’s not for me. So, that’s when I decided to distract my mind from this for a while. We made an AWESOME chalkboard out of some wood, paint, and scrap pieces of cloth! I got to hang out with some fabulous ladies, uplifting fellowship, and just some time “away” from my family. Needless to say, Small Group was just what I needed that night.
God also shaped me to be a mommy. Most other jobs/careers give their employees vacation time, lunch breaks, etc. Employee time tracking can help to tell employees when it is time for them to take a break, as well as helping the employers to know when their workers are taking time off for a vacation. And what’s even better is that some of these breaks are paid leave; I don’t get the same amount of pay for taking a break from my children. Maybe I should try something similar to this as I don’t have the luxury of getting those “breaks” everyday; however, I do have the luxury of getting to be with my girls everyday of the week. 🙂 Along with that, I have the luxury of a lot of other things that I absolutely love! So some “mommy time” away from my kiddos every so often is OK. It’s my “break”. I think that as a mom, it’s good for you to have a little “mommy” time. Mommy time is a must! It refreshes, recharges, and re-energizes you. Just as an employee comes back from a week of vacation refreshed and ready to dive into work again, I come back from “mommy time” ready to see my girls and spend time with them. So, my point of this whole post? Mamas, take a break, and get some “mommy time.” Refresh, recharge, and re-energize yourself. Don’t feel guilty or selfish for some time away every now and then. God gave you gifts, talents, and abilities he didn’t give to other women. Don’t compare yourself to other women or mothers. God shaped you to be you, and gave you what you needed to raise your kids.